It is the holiday season once again and, I'm going to say this pretty bluntly, the Christians come out enforce. When I first was questioning my spirituality, and seriously thinking of switching my faith to Buddhism I found Christian Holidays suddenly confusing. Especially Christmas.
One of the reasons I gravitated towards Buddhism is because the idea of alleviating suffering, and being kind, compassionate and giving was encouraged and supported as a lifestyle. While my husband will argue that most faiths out there promote the same thing, Buddhism for some reason, spoke to me personally; I got it in the language used. Which is what faith should mean for anyone. It should speak to you as an individual and encourage some percentage of improvement in the way you choose to live, even if it is a small percentage.
It is rare that I berate other faiths. To tell you the truth I don't feel that I actually berate other faiths so much as berate some of the people who interpret them for their own selfish needs. Which brings me back to the holiday season. Around this time of year there are suddenly lots of posts on Facebook, basically sharing, complaining if you will, that people cannot say Merry Christmas anymore, that good Christians are "forced" to now say Happy Holidays. I call shenanigans on this mind set and here is why.
- ONE- Most the people complaining don't attend church except on the holidays, and some not even then. People who complain in this situation are the bad definition of being judgmental. )see Absence of Judgment blog.)
- TWO- Many of the complainers are male. Which I find interesting actually. Haven't figured out why this is, not sure it holds any relevance at all really. But it is a fact based observation, make of it what you will.
- THREE- ummm HELLO just because the constitution, and pledge of allegiance state "one nation under god" does not mean that everyone believes in God or should believe in God! Shocking to many Christians I know, but that doesn't make some one less of a human being. Just makes them of a different faith. People of different faiths feel as strongly about their chosen spirituality as Christians do about theirs. This is a commonality.
- FOUR- It is polite to wish a Happy Holidays NOT Merry Christmas AND for the record to non Christians; if you want some one to respect your faith then it is appropriate, and respectful, to wish your Christian friends, relatives, etc. a Merry Christmas. Fair is fair. Can't complain, and advocate for recognition of your faith while using the same behavior you are trying to change. Just sayin...
- FIVE- What is needed is more awareness about each other, not complaining that once again no one lives, thinks, and breaths like you do. sheesh.... Take the time to inform some one about your beliefs. This does not mean that a conversion is needed. What is needed is simply a conversation, an exchange of ideas ,beliefs, intellects. Take the time to listen.
Then he asked how do I get guidance, who do I answer to? Everyone needs something greater then themselves to be accountable to. I said simply, we have the Dharma which is the teaching of Buddha, and the Songka which is the Buddhist community. I also shared that in Christianity God is the light, in Buddhism I am the light. I am accountable to me for my actions. The motivator is how I feel when I choose to be kind, compassionate, and alleviate suffering. I don't want to be accountable to some one else, or the idea of some one else; for me being accountable to me is more important. I could see that he still thought I was misguided and needed Christ, but he was respectful and learned something that day.
My husband who is accepting of my choices shared once that it made him sad that I would not meet him in heaven one day. Hmmmm....I shared that if I thought that way I could choose to think that he would never reach Nirvana. But I don't think faith, spirituality, religion, God, Buddha, Allah, the universe, science, our own minds, want us to use these values to separate us. They all basically teach the same values the language is just a little different. The commonality is that we all choose to have faith in something. Not that we are all different and separated due to our faiths. Using this mind set the end result is the same and there fore I believe we will all meet each other some where after life.
- SIX- I use to get caught up in the spirit of Christmas, and still do to a certain extent. I like decorating, even though I hate taking it all down. I like giving gifts. But now I try to give thoughtful gifts through out the year. I take the time to give of myself. I make sure that everyone in my life feels appreciated, loved, and valued. Because of this mindset I have found my relationships to be much more meaningful, and authentic.
- SEVEN- Speaking as a non-Christian I can share that the hardest thing to over come during the holidays is NOT people telling me Merry Christmas, I consider this a blessing. It is some of my Christian friends/ acquaintance's feeling slighted, some how, because we didn't get them gifts and they got us one.
Granted I have received some pretty thought out gifts in the past which I have greatly appreciated, but I truly have an issue with those people, and we all have had them in our lives, who just go out and buy something because it makes them look good, or worse they just grab what ever trying to get through the gift giving season as quickly as possible. Seriously, what is the point?
Some of the best gifts I have gotten? Incense, which I use to meditate, a Sequoia tree seed, my favorite tree, old, ancient, towering regal giants who have stood the test of time, if they could speak to us what story's they would tell. Books of all kinds. Coffee mugs. All of these given to me by people who truly know me and not a lot of money was spent.
What I love accepting the most however is when some one just gives me a big hug and says Merry Christmas and takes the time to spend time with us. Actually I prefer this which is why we have our annual Holiday gathering. The point is that other people of other non-Christian faiths have a hard time understanding the huge level of apparent hypocrisy during the holiday season. Why don't Christians spend more time during the year giving, showing appreciation, spending time with loved ones? Why do so many people just run amuck during this one time of year?
- EIGHT- Then it hits me...who cares really? The point is that people are taking the time, even if it is only one time of the year for many people? This is not a moral dilemma really and does not require anyone to judge intent. The intent is good and that is all that matters. In the spirit of giving some times giving means simply accepting. And there it is.
The Pith of the Matter. It is not the season of giving, but the season of accepting. If we assume that people strive on a daily basis to be kind, loving, compassionate and giving through out the year the holiday season teaches people how to accept these gifts. Getting a gift that is not really needed is actually practicing to accept help that you possibly don't think you need at other times of your life. It teaches us to be gracious, and accepting. The holiday season teaches us to be gracious and accepting of all faith's during the holiday season because it is the season of acceptance, not giving. Simple as that. ;) Namaste Peace out
http://secularbuddhism.org/2013/05/03/what-is-the-eightfold-path/
http://www.buddhanet.net/e-learning/8foldpath.htm
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