“For long the two enemies looked at one another, Hook shuddering slightly, and Peter with the strange smile upon his face.
"So, Pan," said Hook at last, "this is all your doing."
"Ay, James Hook," came the stern answer, "it is all my doing."
"Proud and insolent youth," said Hook, "prepare to meet thy doom."
"Dark and sinister man,“For long the two enemies looked at one another, Hook shuddering slightly, and Peter with the strange smile upon his face.
"Dark and sinister man," Peter answered, "have at thee.”
― J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
A couple of years ago, out of curiosity, and because my youngest son was using it, I started a Facebook account. I had a MySpace page for a bit then and was told it wasnt cool anymore; so being the cool, good, involved mom that I try to be I switched to Facebook. This whole online communication thing to me was strange, and still continues to be so. I think many people of my generation feel the same way. It is often percieved as having mor cons than pro's. Good because it does give an opportunity to keep in touch with people whom you might not otherwise be able to. Bad becasue...well...people seem to get too caught up in it and it recieves far more attention than it deserves.
I am a Facebook pariaha because I only have 64 friends and to tell you the truth Im not quite sure all of these can be considered close friends, some are aquaintances, some are friends of my sons and some are family; BUT they all share one ting and that is respect. I am careful in whom I allow to post and view my post on Facebook. I do not allow clients to have access to this, I do not allow employers (and from time to time employees) to have it, and I am careful about which teachers (currently none) have this information. My Facebook page is for me to be able to socialize with people and keep in contact with persons whom, as ppreviously metnioned, I would not be able to do so. It does not reflect my professional life; I keep my private and my professional life seperate. If I have a strictly professional relationship with someone I would not consider giving this person access to my private life. It really is none of my employers, instructors, co-workers, clients business what I do on my own time. I can say this with confidence because I feel that I, and my family, lead a good, happy, contened life with nothing to be embarrassed by.
If you are on my Facebook page it is because I trust you and know you accept me, my family, and my life with out judgement and I feel the same about you. YES...(because I know my sons friends at this point are gafawing me) I use it to keep track of my sons goings ons; BUT they know that I trust and respect them, even if I do from time to time question some of their choices (question being the opporitive word here. I do not insist they do what I think is right for them, I just want to make sure that they feel they are doing the right thing.)
Anywho...I periodically clean house on my Facebook page, not because I have stopped respecting anyone...well I take that back, but it is a rarity, but because I dont want to be a collector of people. I want to surround myself with people who are active in my life and vice versa. I have blocked a small handful of people. I will explain why because this is The Pith of the Matter.
I actually like Facebook it is another interesting venue to b eable to express point of views, thoughts, opinions etc. You can do this all sorts of ways, simple little quotes, thumbnail pics of art works historical or not, Comics, website attachements, real photos, the list really is endless. It is the electronic version of freedom of speech. AHA there it is...freedom of speech.
http://www.uscourts.gov/EducationalResources/ClassroomActivities/FirstAmendment/WhatDoesFreeSpeechMean.aspx
Here is a site for you so you can read in detail. The first ammendment basically says,"Congress shall make no law...abridging freedom of speech." So bare with me cause this is where it gets interesting. This law enables us to post all kinds of opposing views concerning politics, religion, etc. on our Facebook with out fear of retribution from the government. BUT it does not protect us from other people on Facebook.
I will give you an example. During the last Presidential election I did not vote. This does not make me a poor American, no where does it state that as an American I HAVE to vote, it states that I have the right to vote. I CHOOSE not to vote because, frankly, I didnt much care for any of the canidates and I dont believe in voting for the lesser of two evils. (Not literally evil,,,just a saying.) I stated my view point on Facebook and an old friend from Facebook fired back,"If your not going to vote then shut up." Well....huh...interesting; I always respond to bullying. (NOT)
Another example I have watched, for some time now, is two people on my Facebook constantly jumping on each others shit for expressing opposing view points. One is admittedly trolling the other on purpose because, well honestly the other person keeps on falling for it. But I think I can safely say to both these persons (and you know who you are) that we are all over it. This example goes beyond the normal trolling scenario because both people are percieved by many around them as taking, what the other person has said, very personally.
Heres the thing that all of us, including me from time to time, forgets. When we express a point of view, opinion, or make a comment regarding something everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, has the right in America to express an opposing point of view. What perplexes me is why do people take it so personally? I mean really? Get ready cause I am about to drop a truth bomb. IF you feel confident about your morals, values, points of view etc etc then why is it so important to you that everyone you know feel exactly as you do about it and agree with you? Isnt that a lack of confidence?
A couple of months ago my husband and I had, what we percieved as, a fun, intellectual discussion regarding Darwins natural selection theory on Facebook. Personally I dont care for the theory, I dont think it is relevant in todays world. Humans have progressed past the idea of natural selection and I think WW2 proved that it was bullshit. In current psychology books and information Darwin is rarely referenced anymore; credit is given only for his theory of evolution, which still holds some merit. The person rage quit...unfortunate. I assume it was because he felt he was loosing....but loosing what? I was not attempting to take anything from him, only expresing politely and respectfully my point of view. By the way many people were watching the thread and engaged in it, we all enjoyed ourselves.
All these instances got me to thinking. Why does this happen? I think that people are use to percieving much of life these days in anger and frustration. So as soon as someone expresses an opposing view point the first thing is to react with anger and frustration. They do not respond, even though one of the choices is always to respond. These are the same people who get down right biligerant about their Facebook page. "ITS my page dammit Ill psot what ever the hell I want." Well the thought is nice, but the presentation sucks.
http://www.facebook.com/page_guidelines.php
http://www.stevebarnes.net/top-10-facebook-rules-and-regulations/
http://www.facebook.com/legal/terms
Here are three sites that give information on how to effectively use Facebook. I encourage everyone to read them.
A couple of other things to consider. If you are so obsessed with Facebook that
1.) you spend more than 30 minutes a day (and honestly that to me is still alot of time, you can paruse through home page and your page in about 10 minutes,)
2.) have more than 100 people on your page (and this does not count high school pages or advertsing pages, this refers to personal pages only)
3.) Dont know who even some of the people on your page are.
4.) Call these strangers friends. And finally
5.) Take what ever you see on the internet and post it on Facebook as the honest truth and absolute last word on anything;
YOU HAVE A SERIOUS PROBLEM!!!
Facebook is a tool to make communication fun and easy. Like any tool if it is not used correctly it causes injury.
Just to give myself a reality check I will tell you that my Facebook, as a whole, is usually full of postive, peacfull messages. I think people are thrown of guard when they see me post other wise. I know that my peace filled page irritates some people. I am not always that peace filled. But I am human and realistic. I continue to post peaceful messages because that is what I beleive and strive for. And in my opinion it is far better then messages full of hate...what ever that means to you. It is easy for me to continue psoting what I do because I feel it to be the right thing for ME. I look at my friends and familys posts, some I like, some I dont. BUT I am never insulted if I post something and no one likes it or someone (Buddha forbid) posts an opposing comment. It is their opinion. This rarely happens however and I think it is because I dont feel the need to gain approval concerning my personal view points (for one) and (secondly) I dont just let anyone friend me and vice versa.
Come on people, in real life you cant be friends with everyone. You cant have everyones approval all the time and not everyone is going to like you all the time. Facebook IS NOT the real world!!!
We all know the story of Peter Pan and the Lost boys and how they didnt want to grow up. They lived in a fantasy world, surrounded by danger but most of the time taking it all very lightly, treating it like a game. It wasnt until someones life was in danger that suddenly their world became very real to them. I am not saying that Facebook is dangerous, but for those who choose to get lost in its never never land quality it can be.
“Stars are beautiful, but they may not take an active part in anything, they must just look on for ever. It is a punishment put on them for something they did so long ago that no star now knows what it was. So the older ones have become glassy-eyed and seldom speak (winking is the star language), but the little ones still wonder.”
― J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
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