Biketober

         


           It is October in Florida.   Leaves don't change into warm hues of red, yellow and orange here.   Most of us don't light our fireplaces yet to keep warm, if we do it is because we come from the north and just want to smell the nostalgia.  We can still go swimming. (If you have a heated pool.)   Disney World never closes due to weather (its been sometime since a hurricane.) AND we have BIKETOBER!!  
          Biketober is where bikers, and I dont mean the person powered peddling kind, amass onto Daytona Beach for the last hoorah of the season before Bikeweek in March.   We put on our leathers and chaps, because now the evenings are cool enough for them, and ride in large groups of friends, or more often than not strangers, around Volusia County.   We ride up and down A1-A breathing in the salt air from the ocean and letting our hair fly loose in the wind.  We cruise through Tomoka Forest with the huge scrub oaks dripping spanish moss, and if it gets foggy we imagine zombies shambling out of the forest.  We visit all the famous local hang outs, the Boot Hill down on Main Street, the Iron Horse and Broken Spoke on US1, and the Cabbage Patch out on I can't remember where...sorry, but I do remember the journey there. 
          We stop at all the not so famous places too.  We oggle the half dressed girls (well not me but my men do) and admire, with deep sighs, how ever single man, no matter how unattractive looks great in leather (not my men, me this time.).  We share tattoo stories and a beer.  Get another patch sewn onto our jean jacket.  Buy more t-shrits, bandanas and leather.  Eat too much vender food.  Show off bikes, and pipes.  And make great friends in a short amount of time.   The sound over the city is the thunder of motorcycles,  and the crisp smell of fall is enahnced by exhaust. 
          Some Floridians dislike these events to the point where they have run bikers off the road doing harm to the rider and bike.   People don't always pay attention to bikers and run them off the road.  Some people just become reckless.   Some bikers drink too much and injure themselves and others.  Sometimes even kill them.  But on the whole, when there is suddenly an addtional few thousand people descending upon a city on motorcycles the injurys are few and far between.  Daytona Beach is still a tourist town and depends upon these events.  At this time of year I want to remind everyone that I have a husband of 28 years who rides and I would like to keep him around a while longer.  He works his ass off for each event, for other peoples pleasure, most deffinitely not his own. I also have a multitude of friends who ride, and work these events, who I would also like to keep around.  So....have fun and remember!

Be aware, look twice then look one more time!  It is BIKETOBER! 

Honor

"All that we are is the result of what we have thought.   The mind is everything.  What we think we become." -Siddharta

 

 

http://tinybuddha.com/quotes/tiny-wisdom-on-living-with-honor/

Honor- honesty, fairness, or integrity in one's beliefs and actions; a source of credit or distinction; high respect, as for merit, or rank. 

           I have been giving thought lately to doing what makes us happy.   This thought has gone in many directions; from doing what pleases others, to doing, what pleases only me to a bit of both.  In the end of my journey I have come to a decision.  I will explain.
          Let me start with a personal experience.   I am in school, again.  (As many of you know.) This is my thrid attempt going back to obtain a degree.  The first time I was 19 and was going to be a commercial artist.  Getting married and starting a family distracted me from that.   Later, in my 30's, when the boys were little I went back to school for child development.  Which I still have a great passion for.   Family took priority again.  My husband was traveling for his job at the time, the kids were in school, and I was working.  I bascially finished everything to do with my degree in family studies except for the acedemics.  Then I became tired and overwhelmed;  I decided that  being a mom, wife and working in child development for quite a few years was enough for me. 
          This was the time where I became Curriculum Director and did trainings for the State of New Mexico.  (It is true btw that if you know your stuff and show a gift for it you will be rewarded.)  I loved this phase of my life while it was happening, I was good at it and appreciated for my talents through out the state of New Mexico.  Then my husband obtained a transfer and we packed up and moved to Florida. 
          Florida is different from New Mexico (and Detroit where we came from before New Mexico).  The educational system is different, the child care systems are different, the people are different.   Not bad just different.  With that said, and you may feel free at this point to read between the lines, I opted not to return to child development and instead applied to another field that I had worked in back in New Mexico, Social Work.
          It was interesting to me that here, in Florida, anyone can work in Social Work.  Social Work agencies (not mentioning names) were hiring persons with degrees in accounting; not sure how this beneftted familys unless they were having problems with their finances.   I personally found this very frustrating; one bad apple gives us all a bad name.
          To make a long story short, due to many mistakes (and I use that word very loosly) the organizations who were hring these people came under fire and had a variety of lawsuits against them; all bascially for discrimination and/or violation of human rights.  tsk tsk  People won their law suits and Florida was forced to lay off many people with in the Social Work field.  Many of whom had training and education in their field but now needed to get a degree the specifically says Social Work.  Fortunate for the familys whe were being serviced by the accountants, unfortunate for persons like me.  But I turned this into a learning experience and Wala...me back in school to obtain a Masters in Social Work.
          I sturggled with this at first.   This was two years ago, I was 48, the kids were and still are grown, my husband and I were starting to get back into the grove of it being just he and I again.  We had purchased the home we would retire in.  We were talking about traveling and having free time for all those things you dream about while you are busy raising kids, working your ass off, and saving money.   It was nice.  Then the universe decided it had other plans for me.  Dammit....So I made the choice to go back to school, this time for me. 
          Making that choice for the first time in my life really.   The first time I went to learn a career that would not be my lifes passion.  The second time my family was still to important to me to take away so much time from them.  This time I had niether of those.  I was older, the kids gorwn and my husband was (and still is) exceedingly supportive.  So it was a no brainer.  I registered and off I went.  Skipping of to the first day of school never looking back.  It was preschool all over agina only better! 
          Each semester it has gotten better and better.  I have gained a different kind of self confidence that comes with wisdom and experience.   People listened to me, what I had to say was importaint  (and not just because I ws the oldest person in the room) and I enjoyed hearing what others had to say.   Much of the academic stuff I already knew, but the life experience that came with being in settings where you could share ideas, ask questions, and not feel judged was great!  Still is!  The different perspectives has been invaluable.
          Then... once again, when you get comfortable and things are going great ready yourself, that is when the universe will throw you a curve ball.   Then...I started getting noticed by Professors and Instructors.  One recommended me for honors college.  This was back in only my first semester and I was a little intimidated by it so I decided not to.  Another opportunity came up for Honors in ASL (American Sign Language) and I decided to take it.   It was more along my field of study and I enjoy ASL.  To make a long story short this ended up being more than I found myself able to handle.   I was already taking four classes and two labs; I found that adding honors to it, in the end, was too much.  It required me staying in school for an extra semester (at least) and keeping my GPA over at least 3.25.  Well my GPA is well over this, but the idea of it suddenly being something I really needed to pay attention to quite literally stressed me out.  I suddenly started becoming this driven, obsessive, complusive stepford student.  I went from three days in school to five days in school and literally doing homework 98% of the time at home.  I didnt like myself too much and I started to not feel so good about myself.  Then some of my grades began to drop.  Interesting, with all the work I was doing you would thing it would be the opposite, but it wasnt.  The more I studied the worse my grades became.  Those instructors in school who state,"If you are not doing well it is because you are not studying enough" are full of crap.   (and I have since shared this with them...nicely of course.)
          My husband pointed out many times that if I stopped stressing about it so much it wouldnt be such an issue.  But this is much easier said then done.  I am a bit of a perfectionist, but I channel it into my spirituality by doing my best and being loving and compassionate.  Well this was not working with Honors.  It wasnt like teeling the truth and walking away from it nicely. It was more like the truth always being right there, not at my feet, but staring me down.  The truth was school was not so fun anymore, learning was not fun... So after a couple of agonizeing weeks I stopped myself and meditated on it.  This is what I have come up with.
          Going to school was all about me.  Doing something that I have always wanted to do and loving it!  It was a chance for me to learn and interact with others in a learning environment.  Honors was not.  Honors was about acheiving a great level of academic acheivement for others.  I liked that others saw me as special because of Honors.  But if I was wrong or made a mistake then suddenly people had permission to devalue me.  It suddenly became about competeing and I don't like to compete.   This led me to thinking about how others percieved me and why was I really doing Honors in the first place.
          There will always be people who are eager to see you fail.  Not that they set up a cheering squad and wait in ready for you to fumble; but they will use your failures to make them feel better about themselves.  Bleh....That is not what I role model.  I role model doing your best and learning from mistakes.  Being loving, compassionate and wise.  I was happy and content where I was with my schooling!?!  Why was this not enough?  Then I realized it was.  So I backed out of honors.
         Some all ready have said it was because I couldnt handle it.   That is certainly one way to look at it.  But I can tell you that I know with in me is a person who can work 40 hours, go to school part time, while taking care of two small boys, and a home by herself while her husband travels for his job and is gone anywhere from 3 days to a month.  Ive done this.  Been there done that.  Ive proved that it is in me and I dont need to anymore.    
         The Pith of the Matter?   What I need to prove now is something much greater.   Self satisfaction with me as a person.  Contentment with where I am in life.  Contentment with who I am in life.  Having more is just more stuff, more baggage, more suffereing...it doesnt mean you are more as a person.  Being content is feeling more as a person.  Less is more.  Less to suffer over puts more focus on what is to really be appreciated.  (remember the idea of suffering in Buddhism?)
         This realization and path is what has gained me more respect from others, and more importantly in myself, then any other aspect of my life.  It is what happens when you are 50 and are ok with what you have seen and done with your life so far and it is this realization that continues to help me learn from my mistakes and be a better person.  When I stop learning from this then I have greater problems then not entering honors college.

Im Looking Through You

          "WIth wisdom as bright as the sun and the moon, and timely use of skillful means, they make the enterprise of the Great Vehicle prosper and grow, and lead many to attain supreme awakening quickly.   Always living in the blessedness of a reality that is fine and wonderful, with immeasurable great compassion, they save the living from suffering."

_the Lotus Sutra (Buddha speaks of bodhisattva's)

http://www.tricycle.com/new-buddhism/bodhisattvas/what-bodhisattva
http://buddhism.about.com/od/mahayanabuddhism/a/aboutmahayana.htm



         This has been an interesting semester for me.   Hard, but not the way I suspected.   When I first started this semester I was very motivated and full of energy.  I had just taken the summer off, and was relaxed and centered.  I was sure that four classes with two labs would be fine.  I knew that I had two classes that were going to be challanging, but I am not working right now, the kids are grown, and the husband is very supportive.  Then I started feeling off balance. 
          At first I attributed it to having so much work...but I am an organized person so once I had my work load organized I was fine.   Then I thought it was because I was having difficulties in a couple of classes (math especially) but once I started going to tutoring and recieving extra help that cleared up.   Then I realized something.  This semester is encouraging my growth as a person.  Let me explain.
          Three out of four of my classes are ASL 3 (American Sign Language), African American Literature, and World Religion.   The instructors/ professors in each of these classes are outstnding.  Not only do they teach curriculum, but they challange perceptions.   If I had not had all three of these at once I think I would not be changing my percpetion on the world.
          Suddenly I am seeing things, that I knew were there, but didn't observe as closely.   In a nut shell I am suddenly percieving more people, then I orignally had, as having low tollerance and being discriminatory.   Why is this?  Not why am I suddenly seeing this, I know why, my instructors are doing an awesome job and I get what they teach, but why are there so many people out there who choose to be intolerant. 
          I am a social worker, I am Buddhist.  I have seen environments, and people living in them that most of the norm don't even think about.  I am Buddhist for a reason, I believe in love and compassion for all, I believe in teaching the value of understanding suffering and I believe in meditation. 
         What I want to know is why are there so many people out there who are intolerant?  Here is where my mistake on this perception comes in.   I always attributed intollerance mainly to racism, but this is not the case.   Intollerance, at its core, for many people, is directed towards anyone who is not like yourself.  Do you know what that means?  The implications of that? 
         It means that there are a large number of people who basically don't like humankind.  Including, no doubt, themselves.  Such a needless choice in regard to suffereing.   I have an easy solution to this.   The next time you feel yourself starting to say, either in jest, or seriously, something that may be percieved as intolerant, stop yourself; form it as a question instead first inside your head, then out loud.  Start a loving, wise, compassionate, conversation with someone, or a group of others.  
         I will share a personal experience that has made me wiser.  Wednesday evenings I have African American Lit.  I have not other way to explain the following, but I assure you there is no disrespect intended, and if I could explain it with out the following discription I would.  I am one of two white people in the room.   I cannot explain the level of discomfort the first couple of weeks, not in me, but from my classmates.  The first day of class at least three people walked in to the room, looked at me and walked out in confusion.   Many people were afraid to speak their mind, including myself.   I honestly picked up on some, hmmm, negative feelings, from others that were keeping them, and me, from opening up on many topics.   I was interested, and confused.  
          Prejudice is prejudice in any form.  That whole concept or reverse discrimination is rediculous.  The idea of reverse discrimination is basically the idea of being vengful.  So coming from someone who does not promote, encourage, or support discrimination in all its ugly forms seeing it always shocks and saddens me. 
         Here is my mistake in all of this and what I learned form it.  For a couple of weeks I sat and said nothing.   Then a couple of things happened.  One; I started reading the Lotus Sutra; a beautiful Buddhist scripture on how to be loving and compassionate.   Two: I researched some startling information for class concerning how deep racism goes in the American culture, three: I started doing ASL honors and finally four: a heated debate took place in my World Religion class concerning Buddhism.  
         Wow...suddenly the universe had put me in the center of discrimniation and some of it was truley directed towards me.   Being Buddhist I did not react, I took it all in and was truley working from a place of love and compassion.  I explained to a friend during this time, whom I confided in, that I do not need to make anyone else undestand my path.
But I soom realized how wronge I was in this thinking.
         In the spiritual path I have taken not only is it important to be loving and compassionate, it is also important to be wise.  It is important to gain wisdom and then share the wisdom you have learned.  uh oh...sitting and being quiet was not the right thing to do.   So I set about trying to figure out what was the loving, compassionate way to deal with this.
         I used my husband (and many other loved ones) as a sounding board.  Even though he is not Buddhist he gets it and understands me.  In a nut shell it is not what is said but how it is said, and what is said does not have to be agreed upon by someone else.  I just need to share my feelings/ thoughts on what I feel is important, lovingly and compassionately.  Basically it is once again the idea of laying the truth at someones feet and then backing away from it.
         Then I had another thought.  Arn't many of todays problems due to the fact that we, as a society, do not talk to each other?  We don't make the time, and I mean MAKE THE TIME, to just talk with each other.  More importantly LISTEN to each other.   This does not mean you have to agree with the other persons opinion it just means that you agree to at least UNDERSTAND!   Understanding someone else is at the heart of tolerance.  It is at the heart of love,  It is at the heart of compassion.
         So I went out there and started sharing using my whisper voice and the truth as I see it.  I didn't use anger, I used love.  I didn't use intolerance I used respect, and I didn't share impetience or condensation, I used compassion.  Something miraculous happened.  People listened.  People started opening up to me and I listened back.  The learning experience has been invaluable.   We really do want to learn from each other and be better for it; it really does just takes one person.
        At the beginning of every semester I go in with feelings of excitement and motivation.  These usually get derailed (briefly) due to a heavy work load or disenchantment.  I have gone to school many times.  I am fifty years old and much of what is being taught in school I have done already.  The challange is always looking for what I don't already know.  Well what I have learned it not only understanding the concept of tolerance, but being brave and teaching the wisdom of tolerance.  Not just in my blogs, but daily as I see the teachable moment.   The Pith of the Matter is everyday is an opportunity to learn and share what we have learned.  If we all used the opportunitys given to us imagine the great changes that would happen.

"I'm Looking Through You" - The Beatles

I'm looking through you, where did you go?
I thought I knew you, what did I know?
You don't look different, but you have changed
I'm looking through you, you're not the same

Your lips are moving, I cannot hear
Your voice is soothing, but the words aren't clear
You don't sound different, I've learned the game
I'm looking through you, you're not the same

Why, tell me why, did you not treat me right?
Love has a nasty habit of disappearing overnight

You're thinking of me, the same old way
You were above me, but not today
The only difference is you're down there
I'm looking through you, and you're nowhere

Why, tell me why, did you not treat me right?
Love has a nasty habit of disappearing overnight

I'm looking through you, where did you go
I thought I knew you, what did I know
You don't look different, but you have changed
I'm looking through you, you're not the same

Yeah
Oh baby I'm changed
Ah I'm looking through you
Yeah I'm looking through you

Gaming 101

 

 

 

I know I have mentioned, briefly, in a few blogs that I am a gamer. Not the bingo, slot machine, playing black jack on the cruise ship kinda of gamer but the role playing, dungeons and dragons kind of gamer. Yeah I know...in your head this now gives many of you who have been following my blog justification to stop reading them and discredit me....bleh. I not only feel, but am sure, based on observations, and fact, that gamers have gotten a bad rap over the years. I am not, however, one of those gamers who turns a blind eye to the fact the many gamers deserve the bad rap. But like many social groups that stand outside of the norm, one bad apple will give a bad name to all of us.

Sunday nights I watch the TV series “Snapped”. My husband jokingly will state that I am trying to get ideas...but the truth is that I periodically watch, waiting to see one of my past clients on it. Last night they were show casing a young girl, in her early 20's who had some how convinced a mentally disturbed male, who was a little younger than her, to kill her father. For those of you who don’t watch this program they tell the story of what ever murder they are focusing on through a variety of different people who were close to the killer(s) and victims. I found it interesting that in this particular story a lot of emphasis was put on the fact that the girl who had her father killed was interested in role playing and dungeons and dragons...like somehow this played an important part in the murder. It was implied that, some how, anyone who participates in role playing games is mentally unstable to the point of committing murder. (I am now making raspberries at the computer screen...and using the rag which I keep for such occasion to wipe the screen off with after wards.)

This is the type of advertised misunderstanding that has followed gaming ever since if originated back in the 70's.

OK...so let me give you some realities of the gaming community. First of all many persons who participate in role paying games also play other fantasy based games. Including, but not limited to, card games, board games, and computer games. Most, but not all, are fans of comics, scifi fantasy based books, and movies of the same genre's. Gamers appreciate the art work, creativity and imagination that goes into all of these. Most of these persons are very intelligent. Most of these persons are not particular lily interested in sports, but this is not the norm for gamers. (Two out of three of my gaming sons have participated in sports including wrestling and football.) We don't all eat nothing but hot pockets and drink mountain dew. (and yes we have all seen that episode of South Park and for the record it is actually a spin off of an underground CD that was put out back in the 80's that most gamers have heard and laughed till tears were rolling out of our eyes; we have more of a sense of humor about ourselves then the norm does about us.)

Other stereo types concerning gamers are; we are all nerds, homely, and anti social. But the majority of persons I know who participate in gaming are none of those. Yes beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, but I can off hand think of two hands full of people who like to game that persons of all social types find extremely attractive.

Gaming is not about how you look, it is about creating and imagination. I think we can agree that there are very few actors and actress's that don’t have a certain appeal of one sort or another to the majority of persons our there (the norm). And many well known members of the music industry have admitted to playing role playing games. (WOW has locked down servers for the famous...can you imagine playing with Vin Deisal!?!) Thanks to the “Big Bang Theory” the perception of gamers and nerds is changing. It is now becoming cool for people to be intelligent and imaginative. But what about those who still give this social group a bad name? Like that girl on Snapped?

Well first of all the girl in question lost her mother to cancer when she was only 14 and was raised by her father WHO was sexually molesting her. This young woman’s refuge for many years, her way of escaping the pain of the reality she was living was to delve into role playing games. YES having an adolescent that immerses, his or herself, into role playing games to the point where it is hard to separate illusion from reality is an issue. BUT here’s the thing! WHY why do persons with in the norm ignore this red flag and blame the bad consequences of this escape into reality on the game and not the person, persons and environment surrounding the gamer who has lost touch with reality? When ever anyone looses themselves in anything to the point that other aspects of life become lost to them then there is an issue; this just doesn’t apply to gaming.

Gaming is like many social cultures outside of the norm. Many cultures are misunderstood because they are unknown to many. Goths are misunderstood, Bikers are misunderstood. Even jocks, beauty queens, the gay community, the deaf community, handicapped (of all kinds), artists, the list goes on and on. If you participate in any social group that is a minority then chances are you are misunderstood. THEN the majority (the norm) takes the opportunity to ostracize the minority. Unfair?...absolutely, but in human nature there is safety in numbers...and in human nature we are all cautious of what we don't understand; it is a defense mechanism that serves a good purpose.

As a Social Worker when ever I meet and/or enter a new home I assess the environment within the first three minutes that I enter it. I take in the condition of the environment, the cleanliness, the clutter, the type of clutter, the smells, the lighting, and most importantly the feeling of the environment. I asses the people, the sound of their voice, how they smell, how they look, their aura, how the children interact with each other, their parents and me. Yeah I know...sounds a bit judgmental, and if you are not careful it can be. When things are hard most people will not be at their best, so that is important to remember when assessing an person and or environment. BUT sometimes, just sometimes, assessing the situation and the people in it has served me well. It has made me safe and more importantly has given a red flag to circumstances that other wise may have gone unnoticed and made a difference in a persons, a family’s, and a child’s life.

My point here and the Pith of the Matter is...if you don’t get to know the environment, and the person(s) in it how can you make a judgment?

For many people the problem of discrimination lies in the fact that they never move past the initial assessment. They don’t get past the first impression and get to know what is underneath.

I got involved in gaming when first edition D&D came out. It was a box with about 4 sheets of graph papers, some brief paper instructions, about six generic monsters and some plastic die which are now considered, by old school gamers, to be collector die. I have one of these box sets squirreled away in my gaming closet. YES I have a gaming closet which stores everything I find to be interesting and collectable in the genre I find entertaining. (And when it is opened you can here heavenly voices on high singing.)'

In my life time I have known (and still know) persons who have collected ever edition of Superman, Batman, X-Men, Ninja Turtles, Spider Man, Red Sonja, and many others since they were young. Now that they are adults they can afford to find and spend the money of the rare issues, and they do. I know persons who have bought every single mini (miniatures of a variety of different figures varying from monsters, to humans, to elves, to dwarfs etc.) since they were first made. AND I mean every single mini...they have a separate room in their homes to house them, they paint them to look very realistic and enter into very prestigious mini painting contests.

I know persons who have read every single role playing system known to man and can quote, almost verbatim, what is written in the book. (Although I will argue with them that playing by the book so rigidly deters from the true idea of role playing.) Many of these people hold jobs that pay very decently, are intelligent, dress very nicely, and if you saw them on the street you would never suspect that they call themselves (with pride) gamers.

Like many social groups we share a common language that many persons outside of our group cant understand. Yes some of us know elvish and Klingon...that’s almost such an ordinary classification that it makes the persons making fun of this humorous. In reality very few of us have the patience and intelligence to study, and memorize Elvish and Klingon, so when you are in the gaming community and meet someone who has taken the time to learn this, this person is held in respect. Perhaps surprisingly to persons who don’t understand this respect you should know that someone who memorizes these languages does NOT resemble persons from the Big Bang. They shower, and they look professional, I’m pretty sure that if you ever (in his time) met JRR Tolkien you would not suspect him for being a gamer, but he is revered in the gaming community as one of the fathers of gaming. After all, role playing was loosely based on the Lord of the Rings.

Back to the dark side of gaming. Gamers are a little prejudiced...primarily against women. I have often jokingly referred to gaming as a male dominated sport. And it is. It is rare to enter a gaming store (a store that housed comics, cards, role playing games etc) and find a female in it. Women who participle in gaming get an even worse rap then the males who participate in it. We are lower then the lowest. I cannot tell you how many times someone has told me that the only reason I game is to pick up guys...sigh. If you are an educated, self assured, even semi attractive female in the gaming world you are treated like the last woman on earth to gaming males. Which can be pretty intimidating at times. (and not really a compliment) I game because at the end of a long day of social work where I have to be patient, understanding and keep my emotions (which range from sorrow to anger to joy and everything in between) I personally really enjoy hacking off a zombies head. I have a grip on reality. I do not view anyone as a zombie and if I run into anyone who seriously believes that we are heading for a zombie apocalypse then I make appropriate phone calls. I do not neglect my children for computer games. I don not stop socializing and engaging in other activity’s, I do not stop working, and caring for myself and others. My grades do not drop and I don't wear costumes all the time. I engage in a healthy outlet for me. But honestly there are people out there who have a great deal of difficulty with this.

Gaming attracts people who are for the most part socially unacceptable to the norm. SOme of these people do not shower, cannot hold a relationship with a significant other for a very long time, have difficulty in caring for themselves, holding a job, and living on their own. But in all honesty few of them have emotional or mental instabilities going on. MOST of them have extremely low elf esteem and being in the gaming community raises that.

In the gaming community they find a group of people who are like them who they can identify with. THIS IS NOT A BAD THING!!! And for those of you who make fun of anyone finding others who share a common interest and mind set I say SHAME ON YOU!!! Just because you don’t understand it or are not interested in it does not make it wrong it just means it is wrong for you. DO NOT belittle what you don’t understand! And for the gamers who belittle those who don’t understand them shame on you too!

Everything about gaming advocates tolerance. Imagination, creativity historically are always at the forefront of teaching tolerance. Any society and or culture cannot thrive with out teaching and role modeling tolerance.

So here is the Pith of the Matter...again. YES gaming has gotten a bad rap. Its human nature to mock what we don’t understand. BUT the gaming community, the nature of the persons who engage in it fall into two categories. The extremists and the low self esteemers. The extremists are those who know sooooo much about the game that they proceed to mock not only those who don’t know about gaming but many of us who participate, enjoy it but do not participate at the same level they do. The low esteemers don’t care for themselves and there fore project an uncaring for the game that actually gives them so much pleasure.

The third category, which is rare but highly advertised is the escapist who is mentally and or emotionally unstable for one reason or another and uses gaming to cope. It is unfair of any of persons with in any of these category to expect more from persons outside their social group then they themselves are willing to give.

The most tolerant of the persons with in the gaming community is the store owner. He or she is in the position to move product and is in my experience so passionate about gaming that they are anxious to teach that love to others. I am pleased to know on a friendship level many of these persons and am pleased and proud to call them friends. I honestly am embarrassed and disappointed in persons who I know that use gaming to fuel prejudice against females, anti social behavior, and excuse their personality challenges that, if they took the chance to get the hell away from the computer would find a world that they actually can function in.

Gaming while very enjoyable was never invented to serve the purpose of detaching from reality. When gaming is the only thing you can talk about in a social situation there is a problem. And when talking about gaming makes others uncomfortable and ostracizes those who do not participate in gaming the gamer is no better then the person who they feel belittles them for participating in gaming. Tolerance...that’s what this is all about. Tolerance and compassion used by everyone in all situations. The world would be such a better place.